Some of y’all just shouldn’t move to New Orleans. It’s not for everyone. And it’s definitely not like the BS they show you on TV. (I’m looking at you K-Ville & NCIS: New Orleans)
I am born and raised in New Orleans. I am a 5th generation New Orleanian. All that being said – there are many days that I don’t want to be here out of frustration. We have local politicians who get nothing done. We have major problems with the Sewage & Water Board. New Orleans is sinking and the Louisiana coastline is eroding. Even with all this said, I still wouldn’t live anywhere else. But, I know what I’m getting into.
Before you pack your bags, here are the reasons I’m telling you don’t move to New Orleans.
Reason #1: If you’re scared of black people
Everything you love about New Orleans is because of black people. So, if you’re scared of African-Americans or automatically think a neighborhood is dangerous because black and brown people live there – then don’t move here.
You gotta be kosher with all types of people and walks of life to live here.
Reason #2: If you’ve only been here twice
While I recognize you coming to visit and spending your tourist dollars here once or twice – that is NOT a reason to decide to pack up and move here. The fun you had on vacation is not going to be every day of your life.
People have to get up and go to work here, just like every other city. And while I appreciate that you cherish our little city, you gotta learn more about New Orleans than cocktails and Mardi Gras before calling us home.
Reason #3: If you think it’s cheap
New Orleans used to be cheap to live in. Rent, beers, food, etc – it was all very cheap at one point in time. And while it can feel less expensive while you’re on vacay, what our people make yearly here is far less than you do in NYC.
Don’t be fooled into thinking it’s cheap if you haven’t had to live off the wages people are making here.
Reason #4: If you hate noise
We are loud. This is a loud-ass city. You might end up down the street from a bar, or late-night restaurant, or musician neighbors. If you hate noise, we beg of you to move elsewhere.
Reason #5: If you hate bugs
Between termites, stinging caterpillars, fire ants, and flying roaches, you better get prepped for our gnarly bug scene!
Reason #6: Heat and humidity
Y’all. It’s really hot and humid most of the time in New Orleans. We are the Caribbean of the south. If you came here once in February and thought “this is great! they don’t have winter!” and haven’t experienced an August in New Orleans – then don’t move here. It’s not gonna change. With global warming coming into play, it’s only gonna get worse.
Reason #7: If you hate a good time
LAWD. Our people love to pass a good time. If you’re an overall party pooper – don’t even bother exploring New Orleans. This city is for people who want to eat, drink, and be merry!
Reason #8: If you think there is no crime in New Orleans
New Orleans is not a crime-free city. Lock your car doors. Look around you. We are not immune to criminal activity, like all cities in the world. You gotta be smart and use your wits.
Reason #9: If you think we are all Cajun OR it’s like Steel Magnolias
Yes, I have met people who thought they would move to New Orleans and it would be like the movie set of Steel Magnolias. Now I would love to visit Miss Truvy and have her tease my hair – that movie was not filmed, nor was it set, in the city of New Orleans. (It was in Natchitoches, LA.)
While we are on the topic, New Orleans is not “Cajun Country.” Y’all have us mixed up with Lafayette.
Living in New Orleans means you gotta roll with the punches. From hurricanes to potholes to our government not always functioning properly – this city is not for the faint of heart. But, she has magical and mystical ways to make you feel like you can’t live anywhere else in the world.
If you’ve been craving a slower way of life, are cool with just letting things and people be what they are, and aren’t looking to make us DisneyWorld – then come on down!
Sometimes though, New Orleans will just be your favorite vacation spot and not your home. And that’s ok too.
If you’re ready to call New Orleans home, we are ready to have you. Text us!