Why your parents will ruin home buying

why your parents will ruin home buying


Once you’ve decided to purchase your first home – you might get butterflies in your stomach. You might also be slightly terrified. Lots of feelings and emotions will wash over you. This is a large financial decision and as your real estate agents, we are going to help guide you in making the right choices.

Buuuuuuuut…. we have another thing to mention. Let me preface this next statement with, your parents love you and they want the very best for you. However, they might ruin your home buying experience.


How your parents can ruin home buying

Are they helping with the downpayment or closing costs? If your parents are providing any money towards your new home, they will almost always want a say in the choosing of this future home. They mean well. Your parents are trying to protect you from making a bad decision.

While we can all appreciate the gift they are bestowing upon you, please don’t forget that YOU are the one who has to live there and pay the mortgage. If you LOVE the house, then buy the house.


parents & home buying


“When I bought my house…”

The second I hear that line, my body instinctively cringes. Mom and Dad can’t wait to tell your real estate agent that they paid $50k less than the asking price when they bought their home.

We’d like to remind you (and your folks) that we are not in a market that you have that type of negotiating power. In rare cases that a house is EXTREMELY overpriced, we might be able to get away with that. But, don’t bank on that.


“Never pay full price!”

There is some sort of rumor that is passed from parent to parent that you must ask for 20% off of the list price when we make an offer on a house. THIS IS NOT TRUE. We will look at the comps and decide if this house is priced well or not. (And, in our market, many homes are priced very well!) 

Also, if you need closing costs assistance, you just don’t have much negotiation power.


They hate it. 

Sometimes your mother is going to loathe what you’re buying. She hates the bathroom. Or Dad thinks the yard isn’t good enough. Whatever the reasons are – they don’t like the house.

This is going to greatly upset you and you’re likely going to talk yourself out of purchasing this home that you absolutely loved a week ago.

Sadly, this is normal. If you have concerns that your family might do this to you – we encourage you to bring them to the house AFTER you have made the purchase.


Leslie's house


Story Time. 

When I bought my first home, my mom was not super supportive. I know she loves me. I know she means well. She’s also a real estate agent and knows that I am a damn good one. But, that mom instinct kicked in and she immediately didn’t love my choice in a home.


I’m also in the process of trying to buy a new house. My dear mother, again, tried to rain on my parade! It’s just a gut reaction that parents have, I assume.

The house I’m trying to buy is perfect in every way for me. It’s my forever home. She knows that. However, it didn’t stop the words from falling from her mouth.

So, please know you’re not alone. As a real estate professional, I also couldn’t be trusted with my own decisions. :: insert sarcasm ::



In Conclusion

Sometimes parents are just going to ruin the home buying process. You can replace the words “Mom and Dad” with “brother and sister” – or even “best friend.” There are times the people we love the most can make the homebuying journey a less than joyous event.

We see it every day.

Just remember – they are supporting you. They are just worried about you making such a big decision!



Need two awesome real estate agents to help with your ‘rents? Text us. 


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